Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
