Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
