How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
