dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
