So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
