I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
