? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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