He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize