i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
