Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
The Olympian is in my bed
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize