I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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