first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
