Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
