His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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