6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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