You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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