Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
