Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
