I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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