absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
