so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
