Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
