dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
