they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize