Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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