Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
