found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
