i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
and you fell through a lawn chair
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
