so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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