This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
