Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
