For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
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