More tranny stories later!
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
