How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Randomize
