I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
