Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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