D3 body, D1 cock
did you get engaged???
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
