What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
