4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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