508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
The air taste purple.
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