Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
