I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
