Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
please don't ironically join a cult
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