Define "chronic" masturbator.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
