He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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