Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
