I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
