I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
