So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Dicks are not precious.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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