next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
