also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
